This is a story about how my chaotic to-do lists turned into something that actually works — not because I became a new person overnight, but because I finally built a simple system I could stick with. I’m sharing what helped me crawl out of the loop of “I’m busy, I’m tired, I’m guilty, and nothing gets done”: deleting the pointless clutter, unloading my brain onto paper, turning vague dreams into concrete next steps, and figuring out where tasks should live so they don’t keep buzzing in your head. No superpowers, no miracle motivation — just a few practical moves that made everyday life feel manageable again, at least for a while.
Part 1. From “I’ll remember it” to “Why is my life a mess?”
I should say straight away that my experience with managing time and tasks was pretty modest. Before, you could just go with the flow: you go to school, you go to clubs, you do homework, you go for a walk, you go to uni, attend courses, you do homework, you go for a walk… And now that doesn’t quite work anymore, because if you don’t do something, nobody will do it for you — ah, this adult life! And it seems like there’s loads of time — do whatever you like, you’ve got energy (for now), you’ve got the will — but life still feels kind of… unorganised. And you can’t just take and simply do the things! (Actually, you can.)
Obviously, I did have a schedule: lessons I teach, lessons I attend, meetings, doctors’ appointments, events. And there were to-do lists:
- sticky notes with something urgent, stuck to the desk
- a piece of paper with a daily to-do list that’s impossible to finish in a day, so it sits on the desk for weeks… and then months, because new lists are placed on top of it
- alarms on my phone
- a list of recommended books and films in Notes, which grows five times faster than I can actually read books and watch films
- an unbelievable number of notes on every topic under the sun — thank goodness there’s keyword search
- and a pile of thoughts and ideas that I “just mustn’t forget”, but how do you even write them down — unclear — so they were buzzing around in my head, evaporating and returning, and causing that itchy feeling of guilt that none of it has been done yet.
All of this turned my life into real chaos: there’s never enough time for anything, and resting doesn’t work, because any attempt to have a rest triggers guilt about how I could be doing something useful. But useful things don’t get done either — or they get done badly and with too much effort — because my body does need the rest. How do you break this vicious circle?
Part 2. The Great Purge: deleting 500 reminders of a life I wasn’t living
In June, a book caught my attention — it described a task-management methodology. Its title isn’t important for now. If you’ve ever studied time management, you already know this system, use it, or at least have heard of it.
I was told it’s the well-worn classic among time-management books, but from what you already know about my old style of managing time and tasks, it’s obvious that even the basic ideas from a not-exactly-new book turned out to be a real breakthrough for me.
I suspect I’d heard about this book or the methodology before and thought, I should probably learn something like that. But with all the distractions, more interesting things to do, and endless lists of books people recommend, it never stood a chance. Not to mention the fact that lately I managed to read books less and less often, finish them even less often than that, and apply what I learned in practice… almost never.
Of course, I’m the cleverest person in my own life, so I didn’t take the advice literally — I took it as a concept, and then “improved” it. Sometimes, if something hangs and hangs and still doesn’t get done, maybe your subconscious is telling you it’s unnecessary. Or necessary, but not for you. Or it just isn’t the right time.
Once, a stranger on the street recommended me a book by a little-known writer because he’d really loved it. That was years ago — and this summer I still had a reminder sitting in my Notes about that book. What happens if I read it? I won’t even be able to discuss it with anyone, because apparently nobody apart from that guy has read it. Do I need to read this book in my life? Yes, it would be nice, but… stop. Nice for whom? What can an unknown novel give me right now, with all my problems and tasks, if it’ll take several days to read and might turn out “meh”? Or that cake recipe in my bookmarks that’s been sitting there for six years and still hasn’t been baked?
I wonder if people who recommend things “just because” realise that in the modern world it’s literally impossible to run out of things to read or watch.
And then I decided: this isn’t about me. If I haven’t done something for weeks, months, or years, then I didn’t need it. So first I destroyed all lists of unfinished tasks, unopened bookmarks, unread books, and everything else that had been accumulating for years in different places: notebooks, the browser, email. I ended up with 0 out of 500 emails in my inbox and 30 out of 350 notes on my phone — and now the only things that live there permanently are recipes I actually cook from time to time, and a packing list for trips.
Do you have useless lists and bookmarks like that — ones you “really should” go through, recipes you “really should” make, a list of novels or meaningful email newsletters you “really should” read — but months or years have passed and they’re still untouched? Maybe you’ve outgrown them, lost any interest, and they’re unlikely to be useful anymore. If yes — delete them. Delete everything. And notice how you feel afterwards.
Part 3. The first GTD shock: you can actually unload your brain
That book I mentioned is Getting Things Done by David Allen, which describes the methodology of the same name. If you’ve ever looked into time management, you probably know GTD, use it, or at least have heard of it.
I knew, of course, that there are loads of books written specifically to help me get organised — but for some reason I never picked any of them up. Because to genuinely want to learn something, you need strong inner motivation. Or you just need to look into the burning eyes of someone who’s already learned it and got great results. The stars aligned: as soon as I finally decided to tackle organisation, I saw energetic, glowing Anastasia Kay https://www.youtube.com/@funastacia passionately talking about organising time, work, and study. So if you’re interested in these topics like I am, I recommend her channel.
And the first principle of the methodology is: get everything out of your head by writing it down. Need to buy bread, wash the windows, go to the doctor, study public speaking, spend more time with family and less time on social media — absolutely any and all tasks that are in your head, even if you’re not planning to do them tomorrow but five years from now. Everything you think about must be written down. You don’t have to think about categories yet — just write everything as one big pile or put each item on a separate slip of paper. The main thing is to free up your head. Do this right now and see what you got.
Part 4, where I turn “change my life” into “make two phone calls”
There’s no point in knowledge you don’t use. Just like there’s no point in bookmarked recipes you’ll never cook, or the fifteenth T-shirt in your wardrobe that you never wear because it’s not great. (I’m kidding — I only have four.)
Did you like the exercise where you dump everything from your head onto paper? I’m sure if you did it (especially if you did it for the first time), something changed. And if you didn’t, then nothing changed. (I’m preparing for the “Psychics” show, don’t mind me.)
Now it seems to me that writing down everything you need to do is a simple, obvious — and basically the only possible — way to exist. But a few months ago it felt like a genuine revelation. The first week I walked around in sincere astonishment: “Wait… you can do that?!”
I used to imagine I was special. That my thoughts were special, too subtle for words. That my head was a treasure chest of original ideas I would never realise, because one lifetime isn’t enough for everything. And what did it turn out to be? Everyone has exactly the same head!
The author was basically reading my mind. Every person has a certain set of things they need to do in the near future: work, study, home, self-development, relationships. There’s even an approximate number of tasks you should end up with — and it’s also true for everyone. Can you imagine?
Alright then, now that we’ve written down everything we need to do, let’s quickly move to the next stage. You need to take your list and rephrase every item so it becomes a specific action you can take. Most of the tasks I used to write on scraps of paper never got done because I hadn’t defined the next concrete step.
For example, if I want to fix my crooked teeth, the task “fix my teeth” on the list is basically meaningless, because it’s unclear what exactly I’m supposed to do. Plus, it’s obviously time- and energy-consuming, and it’s so big that you don’t even want to start. But it’s easy to turn it into concrete actions.
I know that to fix crooked teeth you usually need an orthodontist and some sort of treatment plan. There are different options, but for the sake of the example I’ll go with an orthodontic consultation and braces/aligners. So what do I actually need to do? Book an appointment with an orthodontist. And what do I need to do for that? Find a clinic (or pick one from recommendations) and call or message them to schedule a consultation.
And what happens? The vague, scary task “fix my crooked teeth” turns into one or two phone calls — a five-minute job!
Sure, after that I’ll need to show up, get scans, discuss options, and follow the plan — but those things can be broken down too. Instead of “fix my teeth” I’ll have small, clear tasks like “go to the consultation on Thursday at 17:30”, “do X-rays”, “choose between braces and aligners”, “pay the deposit”, “pick up aligners”, “wear them for 22 hours a day”, “book the next check-up”.
So instead of writing “fix my crooked teeth”, I write “book orthodontist consultation” — or even better, I book it immediately. The author suggests that anything that takes less than two minutes should be done straight away, without even writing it down. And then you write the next concrete action that appears after the call — for example, “go to the first appointment on Tuesday at 16:00”.
It turns out any vague desires, original ideas, and even bold dreams can be turned into a concrete next action. Not to mention how light and tiny “iron the curtains” and “sort out the desk” suddenly look — the things that used to throw me into horror and paralysis.
Turn each of your tasks into the next concrete doable action and write what you got.
How much time do you actually need to get all current tasks done?
Part 5, where tasks go to live: Calendar vs. everything else
We’ve already made two important steps:
- Get everything out of your head and capture it in writing.
- For each task, define the next concrete action.
Now step 3: build an effective planning system where all of this will live and remind you at the right time.
And this is where things get complicated, because you can instantly split people into those who love tactile stationery and people who love modern digital tech. I am both :-)
And it’s all the big tech’s fault — they make their products just as pleasing, and even more convenient, than good stationery. Only stationery can’t send you a notification when something urgent needs doing while you’re not at home. And it’s fairly awkward to carry a planner everywhere and pull it out the moment a thought arrives and you need to write it down urgently (like “buy potatoes”). Your smartphone, on the other hand, is always with you.
So I use the standard set: Calendar, Reminders, and Notes — synced across all devices. You can use non-standard apps too; I’m just happy with what I’ve got for now, and it has all the functions I need.
Calendar
I’ve used a calendar for ages — I put my teaching schedule in there, which is non-negotiable. Before, I used a small paper planner with a weekly spread that looked like a school diary (I still visualise a week like that spread).
But there are more and more tasks, they constantly move, and there are many that aren’t tied to a specific day. Two paper planners would be too much to handle, and one big one is annoying to carry around. Plus it’s easy to forget or lose — and your whole life is written there!
So I keep my calendar in the standard app. Extra perks:
- you can make events recurring (especially handy for lessons)
- you can add addresses and notes
- you can split events into categories by colour
- you can add events straight from text (someone messages me: “Shall we meet on Wednesday evening?” — and with one tap, Wednesday evening lands in the schedule)
Important: only put things in your calendar that are set for a specific time. For me that’s lessons, workouts, musical theatre school, webinars, an appointment with a beautician, meeting friends, going to the theatre. That way, with one glance you can see how much time you have and whether you can do something or go somewhere at that time.
Don’t put ongoing tasks in your calendar if they aren’t tied to a specific time. And it doesn’t matter whether your calendar is on paper or not. We often make this mistake: we finally decide to get on top of things and cram all tasks into one day because it looks free. And then urgent tasks appear, or a friend invites you for coffee — and you have to move the whole list somewhere else. This creates the feeling that you’re massively overloaded and triggers guilt about unfinished tasks. We don’t need that.
Part 6. Reminders, dopamine, and why notifications are the enemy
All my current tasks live in the standard Reminders app. I haven’t reached the perfect system yet, but I’ve tried grouping tasks in different ways and settled on this. Everything is divided into groups:
- Inbox
- Home
- Work
- Study
- Dreams
- Books
- Films
- Regular.
The “Inbox” folder contains tasks I’ve just thought of and haven’t yet defined a concrete next action for. Every day or every other day I sort them into groups and define the next step.
I’m also thinking of creating a separate folder “For myself”, because at this stage of life it’s important for me to track which concrete actions I take out of love for myself — and to do them as often as possible. For now they either don’t get written down, or they end up in the general pile of household tasks called “Home”.
Then the algorithm is simple: I set aside time for work, study, and home tasks, look through the relevant list, and do — in any order — whatever is convenient / whatever I feel like / whatever fits.
I moved regular tasks into a separate folder so I don’t see them every time in my lists — because they have reminders set. For example, I need to water the plants every three days, and the app reminds me every three days. The rest of the time I don’t need to think about it at all.
Tasks with a deadline are set for a specific time. When a notification pops up and it’s inconvenient to do the thing, you can snooze it for 5 minutes, for an hour, or until the next day. But usually it doesn’t come to that, because I try to do deadline tasks first anyway.
You can also set priorities like “!”, “!!”, or “!!!”, but exclamation marks annoy me, and I don’t use them anywhere except in exclamatory sentences. Otherwise my lists would look like this:
! !!!!!!!!!! !!!!!! !!! !! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!! ! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111
…and it would be completely unclear where to start.
By the way, notifications are annoying too, because you never know what you’ll be doing when one appears — and there’s a 90% chance it will be inconvenient to do the task right then. So it’s worth setting notifications only for things your life depends on. Or if you’ll genuinely regret not doing them.
I love ticking a box (well, tapping a little circle) and marking something as done. It’s like an achievement in a game — incredibly motivating. Like you’re not living life, you’re playing The Sims.
And then the task disappears from the list and goes into Completed — where you can look if you want to praise yourself, but it doesn’t get in the way. And it’s so satisfying to see “119 completed” under a folder name.
There’s also a useful trick for people who keep everything in a paper planner: write a list for this week on a sticky note and move it from week to week if you didn’t manage to do something. Or use a separate page if you have a ring binder. That way you avoid endless crossing out, and everything stays in one place.
You can also implement the same system in Spreadsheets (which you can access across devices). Or in Notepad. Or use one of the many ready-made apps. For example, I liked Remember the Milk. There you can even “friend” another person and delegate tasks to them, or set shared tasks that either of you can do and tick off.
Part 7. Notes: the official home of creative chaos (and Dumbledore’s Pensieve)
Ha! The hardest part of my system is eternal creative chaos. My Notes are sorted into categories:
- memories
- buy
- songs
- languages
- travel
- recipes
- drafts
- published
- learning 1
- learning 2
- …
The “Memories” group contains little records and quotations — not exactly Steve Jobs’s quotes or something — but usually words from people I know, things that aren’t written anywhere else and that’s why they’re valuable. Or reminders to myself. Sometimes I look through them and smile. Or I think.
“Buy” includes shopping lists: “Leroy Merlin”, “Groceries”, “IKEA”, “Pharmacy”, “Mall”, “Wishlist”.
That means when I suddenly feel like popping into Leroy Merlin, I already know what I need there. In Reminders there’s actually a “Remind me at a location” feature for purchases you can only make in a specific place. So when the app sees you’re there, it reminds you what you wanted to do there. But for that to work, it has to use geolocation 24/7, which eats battery — and the feature is useful once a month. So I use a note instead.
“Wishlist” is where I write things I’d love to be gifted — the moment the thought appears. I started it after my last birthday, because people suffer so much with the question “What do I get the birthday person?” But somehow it happened that I’ve already gifted myself half the list. By the next birthday I’ll probably gift myself the other half too, so my friends will have to suffer again :-)
The “Recipes” group helps me quickly remember whether to preheat the oven to 180 or 200 degrees Celsius for lasagne (actually to 220 the last time I checked).
And in “Drafts” I’m writing this post right now. Sometimes drafts become good posts, like this one. Sometimes they never see the light and remain unfinished thoughts or diary entries that are, in all likelihood, interesting to no one but me. I just can’t not write. Sometimes I return to unfinished thoughts and turn them into good posts — but rarely.
“Songs” is for lyrics and sometimes sheet music — the things we learn in musical theatre school. Usually you memorise them automatically, but then half a year passes and you start mixing up prepositions or swapping verses.
“Travel” is for packing lists: for a short trip, a long trip, and for the dacha. If I’m planning to go somewhere in advance, I also write down what I absolutely must visit, what would be nice to visit, and who I’d like to meet.
Notes is the messiest part of all this relative order. It contains the most un-sortable something — the stuff you need to unload from your head, the way Dumbledore pulled memories out to store them in the Pensieve.
I like that you can delete and re-sort notes; that sometimes you can turn something unnecessary into something useful; that they’re always at hand and take up zero space. So the digital system suits me more than fine. And I won’t forget how to write anyway — because in any kind of learning I take notes by hand, and I especially recommend doing that for anyone learning languages.
Part 8. The final conclusions. Why it’s all worth it: clear the noise, and life gets bigger
Why are we doing all this? Why do hundreds of people write books and blogs, run trainings and webinars about self-organisation, while millions of people try to build some kind of system for their lives? What’s wrong with living however life happens? Just live!
Why am I doing this?
At some point — not immediately and not all at once — I realised a few important things.
There are things you can do or not do, because you’re doing them for yourself and nobody controls you. You can sit forever in your chair and dream about how great it would be if they were done, and only vaguely imagine what your life might look like when those dreams come true. Or you can simply do them — and get to see that new life with your own eyes.
And then you realise you were dreaming too small, too grounded. You only did a couple of things nobody expected from you — and you’re already living a life that felt like a dream six months ago. And in that moment, the curtain opens, and you start dreaming ten times bigger. Oh, what’s waiting for you!
Sometimes I can’t make myself start a difficult task at all. I circle around it and all I can think is how wonderful it would be if it just got done by itself — wouldn’t that be great? I hope next time I’ll remember these words. Even better — let there be no “next time”.
You need to remember that when you clear the to-dos, you make room for what really matters.
And if there’s no space, then either they won’t appear — or you’ll miss them, because you first need to fulfil your obligations. Your destiny might invite you on a date tomorrow, and you won’t be able to go because the translation isn’t finished, deadlines are on fire, sorry. And you’ll miss your destiny. It’ll go to someone who’s already finished the translation.
